Attending a strip club is often viewed as a rite of passage for men in the United States, but if it forms into a habit it can lead to an unhealthy behavior of a man showering women with gifts and money for attention that is quickly lost as soon as she sees another opportunity for more money from another man. If anything, attending a strip club can educate a young man the hard way that women can easily seduce and deceive a man into believing she has real affection for him in order to benefit financially. If the young man is wise he will learn how to say ‘No’ to a beautiful woman who seeks to separate his cash from his wallet by attending a strip club a few times. Therefore I’ve decided to write this guide on how to behave in a strip club as a man.

Strip clubs are also commonly called gentleman’s clubs in the USA, although the term is mis-used. A private gentleman’s club is more properly a social club with private membership in an organization. True gentleman’s clubs have greatly declined over the past few decades, leading to the strip club format replacing them in most of the United States and appropriating the label of ‘gentleman’s club’ in common vernacular.

Why Go to a Strip Club?

Gentlemen, going to a strip club is a pleasurable way to hang out with the guys, watch a game, and grab a drink while enjoying the sexy ambiance of the mostly naked chicks dancing center stage. Does this require any further explanation?

Strip clubs are exciting yet confusing places to visit. The women are mostly wearing their birthday suits, beer and alcohol are flowing, and the music is loud enough to make your heart skip a beat. However, these establishments aren’t there to gratify or fulfill sexual desires. If anything, you will leave sexually frustrated when you go there expecting “relief”.

One golden rule is to never touch the dancers, unless they tell you that you can. If this proves to be difficult, sit on your hands. It’s OK if she touches you, but you still may not reciprocate in touching her.

If you can follow that rule and remember that these ladies are there to earn a living, you are way ahead of the newbs…or the “old perverts”.

The most useful thing about strip clubs is that young men can learn how to develop the social skills on how to interact with very beautiful women without tripping over their own tongues. Strip clubs are good environments to practice holding a conversation with a pretty girl who is hit on frequently.

Why Should You Care About Pervert Row

I can’t state this emphatically enough…PLEASE don’t sit on pervert row!

You may be curious as to what “pervert row” exactly is and how to avoid this newbie or “old pervert” mistake.

These freaky seats are located directly in front of the center stage where the dancers premier.

Does this mean that you shouldn’t go up and tip the gorgeous dancer while she’s performing? Absolutely not! Tip that alluring lady and get your special on-stage dance from her.

However, you should never take up residence on pervert row. Your drinks should be delivered to a table or the bar where you should sit most of the time.

Rules to Follow for Sitting in a Strip Club – Avoid Pervert’s Row

Taking up residence right where the ladies are dancing says one of these things about you:

  1. You’re new to strip clubs and have no clue as to how to navigate or enjoy this form of entertainment
  2. Perhaps you’re alone and maybe a tad bit desperate for company
  3. That you may be too drunk to care about your actions
  4. You’re a strip club regular that feels like you’re the king of the club and all of the dancers are just dancing for you.

Each of these statements isn’t a good one. The ladies just see you as someone to target harder to manipulate, in order to separate your money from your wallet.

When you visit these establishments, you want to exude confidence and never seem desperate for attention.

Believe me, being confident works! It’s part of the law of attraction and being successful in life.

Making pervert row your seat of choice doesn’t relay gumption.

Even if you’re visiting the club alone, do yourself a favor and sit at a table or the bar. 

Get Your Mind & Expectations Right

The frame of mind that is necessary to arrive at the strip club with is- a dance is a dance is a dance.

You’re going to the club for fun, not sex. The sex you can get in the strip club, you don’t want.

There are laws and rules that you’ll need to follow at the clubs.

  •  To protect the dancers from patrons that are not being respectful of the rules or the dancer
  •  That the clubs must follow to stay in business and they are consistently monitored by law enforcement agencies and employees for compliance. Customers want or need to “get off” is not what a strip club is for.

When you embrace this, then you can have a stellar time without being disappointed.

You don’t want to go to jail or be embarrassed by law enforcement or bouncers for acting inappropriately. Even if a stripper is willing to give you a handy, you probably shouldn’t go for it. You don’t know how many times she’s done that with another guy in the club, and she can pass STDs to you even from her hand.

Also keep this lesson true to heart; with few exceptions, you’ll almost never take a dancer home with you. Don’t believe their stories trying to convince you otherwise.

Many strippers these days have a burner phone they use to get dudes convinced they are giving them their numbers and will date them outside of the club. What you’ll usually discover is that the girls block your number after they feel they have gotten as much cash out of you as they can for the night. Unless you live in a small town it’s very unlikely you’ll ever see that dancer again, even if you come back another night. This is because the most manipulative dancers can make thousands of dollars in a single night, and then not need to do anymore dancing for weeks or a month.

Don’t fall in love with a stripper because she isn’t going to fall in love with you. Women don’t respect men that they meet at strip clubs and only view them as walking ATMs.

Private Dance Etiquette at Strip Clubs

More key factors to remember when a dancer sits with you at your table or asks you if you would like a “private dance” so that you don’t spend a fortune or get bummed out when the dancers don’t “put out” are:

  1.  A dance is a dance is a dance. Yes, I have said this twice. Knowing that the dance you see on center stage is going to be the same dance you see at your table or in the private area, you will be able to enjoy yourself without going bankrupt. Center stage dances are free unless you choose to tip, and you should tip. Table dances have a fee, plus you are encouraged to tip them. Private room dances are still the same dances you’re seeing center stage and at your table but are located in a more “private” area of the club and are the most expensive dances available and tips are still encouraged. Please know that the private dances are monitored by a club employee and/or by a video camera. So, behaving yourself is required at all times. We will talk more about that next.
  2. Some strip clubs aren’t as busy as others due to location or similar reasons or clubs will have nights that see fewer customers. This means that the dancers may have more free time to mingle with the club-goers. When they come to your table, be a gentleman, and please don’t say rude or perverse things to her. She’s a person first and foremost. Another thing to keep fresh in your noggin’ is that just because the dancer chooses to sit with you, that doesn’t mean she’s ready to go home with you or satisfy any sexual urges or fantasies. You could offer to buy her a drink or ask her to give you a table dance since she has some free time. After all, she’s there to make a living.
  3.  Don’t be surprised when the ladies don’t share factual data about themselves. They have stage names and require a certain amount of privacy and security due to some customers not understanding the basic rules of hanging at a strip club. You don’t want to be a “Stalker Steve”! Help her feel comfortable and don’t beg her to give her real name or specific details that she isn’t freely wanting to share. Instead treat the conversion as throw away practice with talking with a pretty girl and holding a conversation, and how to spot when women are lying to you. The strippers will be lying to you frequently; this is excellent practice for how to detect when someone is lying.

How To Enjoy Your Night Out at a Strip Club as a Man

If you want the abridged version of this article so that you know how to have a great time at a strip club without being arrested, asked to leave, or breaking the budget:

  • Treat the women like they are people and not objects. If you act crazy you’ll get kicked out of the club.
  • Don’t expect the dancers to put out or give you a handy in the private dance area. You really don’t want that from the girls who do this stuff. That’s how you get the herp.
  • The dances that you see center stage or at the table will be the same that you will experience in their private dances. Don’t overpay for a private dance thinking you’ll get a different experience; most clubs don’t allow you to get too crazy with the girls. Bouncers tend to check on girls to make sure they aren’t breaking the local laws and engaging in prostitution, so it won’t be a truly private dance, anyway.
  • Offer the dancer a drink or ask for a table dance when they have time to spare while also being a gentleman with your words and actions. Treat the engagement with the dancers as practice for how to converse with attractive women.
  • Tip the dancers while also understanding that they will keep asking if you want more “exclusive or private” dances. That means if you’re on a budget, keep the dances either at center stage or at your table since those are more affordable than the private ones, and the private dance will be the same as whatever they give you at a booth anyway.
  • Never touch the dancers unless they say that you can. Otherwise, sit on your hands if you feel tempted to reach out or if you already know you’re a touchy/feely type of person. This can be good practice for how to control yourself around beautiful women if you’re the kind of guy who is nervous around pretty girls.
  • And lastly…don’t sit on pervert row! Either sit at the bar or at a table. You’ll save more money this way.

Strip clubs are a unique way to enjoy a night out alone or with the guys especially when you understand that these establishments are for entertainment purposes only and know what to expect when it concerns purchasing dances while sticking to your budget. They are also useful for men with little experience talking to pretty girls to get practice doing so.


Carey Martell is Editor in Chief for The Millennial Gentleman. A thirty something modern man who is politically independent, non-religious but a firm believer in ideals of chivalry and traditional family values. Carey lives his life as a vagabond digital nomad traveling and living life to the fullest while managing his businesses remotely with a laptop and internet hotspot connection.