It takes a lot to be a good dad, and you can’t take it for granted. When you become a parent it’s important that you do what you can to make your kids feel loved and cherished, as well ensure they grow up to become stable, well adjusted adults who can succeed in their own lives and ultimately become good parents, too. There is a lot of literature on what makes a good father, but I’m going to give you my thoughts on the qualities of a good father in this post here at the Millennial Gentleman.

Being a good dad is not easy, but it is rewarding. It’s important to be involved in your kids’ lives and be a good example for them. The qualities of a good father are hard to measure, but they’re essential to raising children. Here are some tips on how to be a great dad.

Be Committed to Your Family and Community

A good father is a man who is not only committed to his family but also to the larger community and society. Being a good father means being involved in the community, making it a priority in your life. The area that your kids grow up in will impact the development of their personality, as the local community culture contributes to a child’s own identity. It is a good idea to not only pick a good community to raise your kids in, but to yourself be involved in the culture of that community and how it is shaped.

Treasure the times you spend with your child. The time will pass you by faster than you can imagine. If you don’t start making a more time for your child now, he or she’ll still love you but resent you for it later. Whatever he or she likes to do, you do with them. Want to play computer games? You do it with them. Like going to the movies? You do it with them. Read a book together. What about painting, or drawing, or building something? Whatever they happen to like to do, you do it with them. This shows that you care about them and what makes them happy, and it’s a good way to form good memories from bonding together.

Be a Champion for Your Kids

A good dad is a person that is loved, appreciated, and remembered because they were always their for their kid when they really needed someone to be their champion. A good dad is one that never gives up even when things get tough, and he stands up for what he believes in until the end. He is one that is present in his children’s lives for the good and bad times in life, and therefore is not easily forgotten. His kids view him as a role model and guide for how to live their own lives, and by being a role model his kids naturally wish to model themselves after his better qualities.

To be a good father, you also need to learn patience and how to be attentive in your children’s lives. You can’t just become easily frustrated and give into anger every time they disobey you. When you punish them the punishments must be appropriate and fit the offense. Minor mistakes should not be heavily punished and major offenses should always be punished.

Being a champion sometimes means having the courage to allow your kids to make their own mistakes and being there for them when they fail. No one can know what they are capable of achieving until they try to do it, and failure is a normal part of life. It is important for your child to strive hard at things and still fail at them, because learning how to pick oneself up from frustration and despair, to still strive hard again to succeed, is an important quality for achieving success in life. No one can accomplish great things with success every single time; success is often the consequence of having never given up and continuing to try to do better the next time. Your child has to learn this for themselves and if you try to be too over-protective, to always do your child’s homework for them or become angry at others when they fail, your child won’t emotionally develop correctly and may become someone that is spoiled or un-motivated. They have to learn the value of failing and getting up again to keep trying as a child, as this is a difficult quality to learn as an adult.

Be Responsible and Take Ownership of Your Duty to Your Kids

To be a good father, you need to involve your self in your child’s life. You need to be committed to be a part of your child’s life.

Raising a child is one of the most important and rewarding jobs in the world. A real man accepts this responsibility and stands beside his children through any storm that life throws their way. He doesn’t pass the buck to other people, deferring judgement to so-called “experts” that claim absurd things are good for children. If you suspend your good judgment and allow child psychologists and teachers to become the parent you will raise problematic kids. The teachers and school counselors are only responsible for the kids for a grade year or two. You have to be responsible for the kids for their full 18 years of life, and often even beyond then. The future of your family line will depend on how successful your kids are as adults. The so-called experts are typically short-sighted, often only caring about how grade performances and behavior issues impact their own job performances. It is ideal for most teachers for kids to be passive and just sit in class passing tests with high grades, and they don’t have any vested interest in your children actually growing up into a functioning adult that is healthy, mentally well adjusted and can succeed in life. This must always be understood.

The best role model for children is a good father that is invested into their growth from babes to adults. You want them to be well rounded individuals; a child that receives good grades but is unathletic, who has trouble socially and making friends, and who has little drive or motivation or passions, is a child that will not grow up to be a stable, functioning adult in the real world. Again, it’s important to have balance in life. With current school trends focusing only on academic performance and anything else deemed a distraction, it is your job as a father to ensure your kids participate in sports, learn how to make friends, stand up for themselves against bullies and explore fields of interest in after-school programs. It is your responsibility to help your child cultivate their talents; don’t expect others to take on this responsibility for you because teachers usually will not. They have no long term vested interest in your children’s lives.

Teach Your Children Good Qualities by Cultivating These Qualities Yourself

Being a good dad is one of the most important things you can do for your children. Being a good father to your kids means teaching them about the value of hard work, perseverance and integrity. These are certain qualities that you must have yourself in order to be a good father. You also need to be a good listener who can guide his children and encourage them to succeed.

To be a good father, you need to be a good man first. This means being honest, being responsible and showing your children that you are committed to always doing the right thing. You should also be thoughtful, considering what will make them happy, especially during times when your child might be depressed or sad about something.

It is important that you are also fair and honest in all your relationships, especially with your children and the people that your children see you interact with. Your children will learn right from wrong based on how you behave in your own relationships. If you are the type of person that teaches your kids it is okay to deceive and lie by observing you doing so, then they will become the type of people that become deceivers and liars. Ensure you take full responsibility for your acts as a husband or parent. Never make excuses for what goes wrong in your household as a way to dismiss your guilt.

To be a good father, you need to be there for your children. When you let your children down by not being present when they need you, they learn how to let people down in their own lives. They will learn how to make excuses for their own bad conduct from the excuses that you make when you let them down and disappoint them yourself, and how you make excuses for when you disappoint others. It’s better to admit when you make mistakes and show the kids how to make amends, than to refuse to admit when you are wrong out of pride.

I hope this article has provided you some good advice for how to be a good father to your children.


Carey Martell is Editor in Chief for The Millennial Gentleman. A thirty something modern man who is politically independent, non-religious but a firm believer in ideals of chivalry and traditional family values. Carey lives his life as a vagabond digital nomad traveling and living life to the fullest while managing his businesses remotely with a laptop and internet hotspot connection.